You hold the dog's collar with the left hand, and grab the shower nozzle with the right. You hose the dog down. He shakes and sprays water all over you. You turn off water with right hand, careful not to let go of collar. With the right, you grab the shampoo, open with one hand (so thankful for my right thumb). Dog has at this point wriggled into a pretzel tie, so you put your dukes up and wrestle the dog. You let out a yelp, scream out "NO" one hundred times, regain control, pour the shampoo, drop the bottle. Bottle is leaking soap all over the bathroom floor. You get the water back on, hose the dog down again, and cry when he bends your arm backwards. The rascal gets away and jumps out of the tub, on you, soaking wet. You get the dog back in the tub, finish hosing him off, lose a contact lens, and presto!
The dog is clean.
You stand up, slip in the puddle of shampoo, and land on your head. Sweet puppy comes over to check on you, and just when you think he is going to take it easy on you, another shake to dry off, all over your face.
You get the towel. You cuddle the baby. Doggie bathtime is all done.
The photo here is of my foster baby, Omega, right after tonight's bath. The events listed before are actual events, only slightly exaggerated.
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